Autumn Update

It's been awhile again. I have been avoiding posting because I didn't want it to turn into a giant whining session. I'm going to try to stick to the basics...

School:

--This week marks the middle of 2nd quarter. And we still do NOT have all of the textbooks needed for the reading classes in my department. Ridiculous.

--The person responsible for overseeing the reading program for the entire county resigned at the end of Sept. (Perhaps this is why we don't have textbooks?)

--The 8th grade administrator is in hospital due to an intestinal rupture.

--There have been 10 fights thus far this school year, including one when a teacher was punched in the face and one where a girl had a huge gash on her forehead.

--Many teachers are feeling the administration doesn't seem to have a handle on discipline this year. (To put things in perspective we had less than 10 fights the entire school year last year.)

--The reading teachers do not have inclusion teachers assigned to our classes this year. In the past we had inclusion teachers to co-teach with us in classes with a large special ed population. This year we're on our own.
--It's making for a super difficult year!

Home:
--No TTC updates to report at this time...will update when I have new news. (Crossing fingers for re appointment during winter break, but I will probably have to wait until March.)
--We were able to drive to Ohio to spend Thanksgiving with my parents. It was wonderful to see them! I am grateful for a wonderful family and for an amazing husband who did WAY more driving than I did to/from Ohio.
--Emma continues to be my shining light. I appreciate her antics and learning discoveries.

Books/Movies:
--I read all of Suzanne Collins' "Hunger Games" books over the long weekend. LOVED them! Great read with interesting premise.
--I saw "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I" and "Tangled" and completely enjoyed both films.

I'll let my fall photos sum up the rest...

Emma's 6th Birthday












We went to the Magic Kingdom to celebrate Halloween at their "Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween" party.


















Jacksonville had a "Boat Day"
Em enjoyed touring and photographing some boats on the downtown Riverfront.







Emma at the "Spooktacular" event at the Jacksonville Zoo


For Halloween night trick-or-treating, Emma dressed as a witch.




DH, Em and I spent the day at the Ripley's Believe it or Not Museum in St. Augustine 2 weeks ago...we had a great time!

House made of match sticks.


Em and I pose next to a statue/replica of the World's Tallest Man


DH looking disgruntled in a pirate torture device.


Em and her elephant pose outside.

Updates:
--As I mentioned, I just haven't felt like writing much as of late, due to not having a lot of "positive" things to blog about.
--I seem to be on Face.boo.k more often now that I have a Black.berry...if there are any readers who'd like to be FB friends, drop me a line at velmadinkley@aol.com and I'll search for you to friend you on FB.

Life Update

A.C.: YES, after 10 days of staying with the in-laws (thank goodness!) our A.C. was repaired. I believe it was just in time, as I think the weather has been in the 90's each day since the repair.

False Hope: The week before Father's Day I took a HPT and had a positive (2 line) result. I was ecstatic, but tried to remain cautious. As it was still extremely early, my plan was to take further tests closer to Father's Day in order to surprise DH. Sighs. Two days later when I took both a two-liner and digital a HPT they were both negative within a minute. Of course AF arrived within a few additional days. Drat.

--I recently saw a billboard that says, "Letting go and giving up are not the same thing." I've been really, really working on letting go...it isn't working yet.

School: Two former students helped me move all of my work belongings into my AWESOME new classroom. Nothing will be unpacked or settled until the end of summer, but I am relieved to not have to worry about my stuff over the summer.

--Still awaiting the FCAT scores from this spring's test. Anxious to see how my students fared.

Books: I've been reading up a storm. (How I love summer!) Current favorites include the "Kingdom Keepers" series by Ridley Pearson. These youth/teen books are up my alley as they are suspense novels which take place at the Disney World theme parks...WAY cool! Also the new Rick Riordan book, "The Red Pyramid" was a great read. I love how he incorporates history (ancient Egyptian in this case) into his plot development.

Vacation: We'll be leaving this week for a 2-week vacation in Ohio. I look forward to time with my family!

Eclipse: The latest "Twilight" film comes out this week! My father-in-law has graciously agreed to babysit Emma for 2 hours (until DH can pick her up after work.) This will enable me to attend a triple feature with 2 of my friends from work. We'll be seeing "Twilight," "New Moon," and then the midnight premiere of "Eclipse." My bum will be SO tired, but it will be SO worth it! :)

Playdates: Em and I have been keeping pretty busy this summer. A new teacher at my school has a daughter who is 6. We've been on 2 playdates with them...Em and her daughter get along great. In addition, we've been on 2 playdates with a friend we met via Emma's pre-school. The mom used to work at the front desk where parents sign in at the school. I made a new friend! Yay! We graduated from high school the same year, both majored in social work/psychology areas which we are no longer working in, both love movies, etc. Anyway, Em and the school gal's son play together wonderfully. (Though he is a year and 3 months older than Em, he is a sweetie whom Emma described as "gentle." Awww!)

Blog: It seems as though I've been on hiatus lately. I started this blog as an online scrapbook and journal for myself. Due to my TTC issues, it became more personal and baby-longing focused than I originally intended. Thus, sometimes I don't want to write because I feel like a downer. I feel like I am going in circles....like my heart's desires are going around and around a track, yet they continue to prefer to veer to a new path one day. It is such a conundrum. My heart longing for a second child. My mind trying to rationalize that I need to "let go" and move on and STOP STRESSING and see what happens. I don't write much, sadly...because there doesn't seem to be anything new to write.

Haircut Girls: Em and I both got haircuts. Short for summer. :)

35 Today

Birthday: I turn 35 today. After re-reading last year's birthday post HERE, I find I am in the same place in many ways. Still hoping, still wanting Child #2, still wondering if I am "meant" to have another child, or if I should try to turn off my longings and be content as a mom of "an only."

What's new this year? I have been diligent about charting my cycles. I have borrowed a fertility monitor and have been using it to determine the ultimate "babydance" days. I met with my OB in January and reviewed the few charts I had. DH and I are to continue "getting busy" on my peak fertility days each month for 6 months. I have a follow-up OB appointment scheduled for early August. If I am not PG by that time, OB will refer us for further testing (she mentioned specifically semen analysis for DH...I don't know yet what I would be involved in.) I am a little frustrated at waiting 6 more months when it feels like we've been waiting forever (we've been trying to get PG for almost 3 years now.) However, as I wasn't actively charting, taking temperature, or consistently using the fertility monitor, I can't blame doc for encouraging that route of "trying" first.

What's similar to last year? Much of why I want a baby is because sibling relationships are important to me. I want Emma to have a sibling! She wants a sibling too, mentioning casual things now and then. For example, when she didn't want to wear her Easter hairclips this week, she told me I could "keep them for if I get a Baby Sister someday." Sighs.

Showers for Friends: Baby Shower #2 went mostly well. My expectant gal-pal is PG with a boy, so unlike Shower #1 where the girly items made me nostalgic, the boy clothes and toys were unfamiliar to me...and good God were the tiny baby clothes the cutest things EVER. I am in love with the teeny-tiny socks that look like sneakers! I was pleasantly surprised to see 2 co-workers from my old school, so I ended up sitting between the two of them. It was good to reminisce and catch up...and luckily for me, this helped keep my mind from dwelling/wandering. Whew!

Spring Break Fun:
Em and I visited Fort Clinch State Park yesterday. (Ft. Clinch was an active fort during the Civil War. It's located near Fernandina Beach...about 45 minutes north of Jacksonville.) Em loved walking around the large fort, through the brick tunnels, and then visiting the nearby beach. Pics below...


Em with cannon on the roof of the fort.




Larger view of roof/cannon area.




Dining Hall


Em in one of the fort tunnels.


Laundry area.


Where soldiers could get uniforms, shoes, and blankets.


Tool shed.


Em thought it was neat to see a U.S. flag without 50 stars.



The main bunker inside the fort.


Em found a shady bench.



Splish splash girl.



Em: "Look at the parking garage I made!"


My beach girl.



Mission accomplished! She-who-hates-naps was sacked out on the car ride home!


Lastly, me with Cannon #35 in honor of my b-day. Here's to the next 35!

Who Cares About Baby Showers, Bring on the Twilight!

Today after school is Baby Shower #1 for the week. I am as "ready" as I can be. I'm hoping for the best....and knowing that it is after school, so I can truly only stay an hour and a half before I have to leave to pick up Emma. And I'm looking forward to meeting the wife of my co-worker who has only been in the U.S. for 3 weeks after finally getting her Visa approved to move here from the Philippines.

Saturday is shower #2. It might be a little more tricky. The PG gal and her hubby are our only "couple" friends left in Jacksonville. They were WONDERFUL about inviting us over when I was newly PG with Emma and she was due to have their first child (K's bday is in May and Em's in Sept.) We talked baby products. She showed me an amazing nightgown with slits for breastfeeding, we talked "new parent" stuff. It was great. I am happy for them to have Kid #2. I am just longing for Kid #2 of my own....so it makes happiness about baby stuff difficult sometimes. We shall see how things go. I think I can put on my game face in the name of friendship and make it through.

But I just heard some REALLY SUPER FANTASTIC NEWS! DH texted me to say that on the cover of "USA Today" there is an article about a new Stephenie Meyer novella that will be released on June 5th! I am STOKED! My fellow Twilight fans can click this link to read the article yourselves.

Dreaming of Edward is helping my baby longings vanish for a little while....

Pity Party and Last Disney Update

I've been in a Funk:
The past few days have been a bit difficult. Mainly due to "bump envy." I received 2 Baby Shower invitations this week. While I am truly happy for the friend and the co-worker I was invited to celebrate with, the invites were a reminder of what I don't have. Sighs. (For the record, I DO plan to attend the showers. I want to support my friends!)

Then Em and I met our friends Stacye and Adrian for dinner. Adrian quickly announced that he's going to "be a big brother." Stacye is 8 weeks PG and due the first week of November. Again---happy for her...but sad for me. And then I feel like a schmooze for feeling lousy. Sighs again.

Thus, my pity party began. I have only 3 girlfriends in Jacksonville who don't work in the school system. All 3 of them are currently PG. (Two of them have a child the same age as Em.)
Internal whining---why can't I be PG too?

My DH Rocks!:
DH was off work yesterday, as he is working today. So Thursday night I called in for a "mental health" day off. Friday after dropping Em off at school, DH and I went out for breakfast. I vented and explained my feelings. Have I mentioned lately that I am grateful to have a best friend like DH? He helped me to feel better. (And I appreciated his validating that I'm not a bitch or a raving lunatic...thanks, DH!)

Yesterday it was sunny and 80 degrees out! We finally had beautiful weather. So after breakfast and some Easter Bunny shopping, we headed home. We hung out for the day with open windows----fresh air blowing through the house. LOVED it. And I got hooked on a new show, "The Tudors" on Showtime....about Henry VIII. Cool show and correlates somewhat with the "Queen Anne is Doomed" book I recently read.

Anyway between DH and the lovely weather, I was able to pull myself out of my funk. (Thank goodness!)

Disney Trip--Day 3: Epcot:
I leave you with the last of our Disney pics (only a month late.) We spent the last day of our trip at Epcot. 5 out of 5 stars. We loved it---I love the "World Showcase" with buildings, shops, and restaurants themed from various countries. They've added a "Kidcot"area at each of the country locations----kids can obtain a diecut paper cutout which is different at each location. (A rocking horse from colonial America, a mask from Italy, a kite from Japan, etc.) Em loved collecting the items, and it made the Showcase area more fun for her. She also loved the aquarium, Nemo ride, and the ride inside of the ball (I can't remember its name). DH liked the roller coaster (can't remember its name either.)

Oops...I'm realizing some of these pics are actually from Hollywood Studios, not just Epcot. Anyway, here goes:

The giant Epcot Ball


Em and I with our rockstar wigs (in the shop outside the Rockin' Roller Coaster) (Hollywood Studios)



The Tower of Terror Ride (Em and DH went---I HATE this ride, as I'm afraid of heights and also feel claustrophobic.) (Hollywood Studios)


Another feature at Hollywood Studios Em loved was the Disney Playhouse show---included puppets with favorite characters from current Disney shows (Handy Manny, Mickey's Clubhouse, My Friends Tigger and Pooh.)


A long time fan of the "Singin' in the Rain" movie, I had to pose with this umbrella on a Hollywood Studios back lot.


Em also loved the Little Mermaid show at Hollywood Studios (sorry for blurry pic.)


A worker helped Em with a Chinese yo-yo in the Epcot World Showcase


Em with her mask and paper diecuts from the World Showcase (I love the eye lashes she drew on her mask.)


Em and I with viking helmets (gift shop in Norway area of World Showcase.)


Family pic outside of the Nemo ride with Epcot ball in the background


Em and DH on the Nemo ride



Happy weekend, all! I'm slowly catching up on blog reading and commenting and WILL be caught up by the end of the week----spring break time! Whew!